Promoting mental health and wellbeing

Starting the conversation

All babies, children and young people should have someone they can share their thoughts and feelings with, regardless of whether they have a mental health condition.

Engaging with a child about their mental health and wellbeing isn’t always straightforward, but there are things you can do to make it as easy as possible. 

Create an open environment

It’s important to create an open environment where babies, children and young people feel listened to, understood and supported.

Having regular conversations about mental health and wellbeing helps establish a culture of openness. For example, in early years settings, schools, colleges or academies, you can integrate discussions about mental health and wellbeing into your daily lessons or activities.

Make time to check in with the children you work with. Talk about how they are feeling, in large or small groups or on a one-to-one basis as appropriate.

It’s also important to give children space to talk about what is happening globally, nationally or locally – such as climate change, global conflict, crime or a bereavement.

> Find out more about how to have difficult conversations with children

Let children know you’re there for them

Every child should have safe and trusted adults they can talk to about any worries, concerns or questions they may have. 

For babies and very young children you can let them know you are there for them by quietly sitting close to them. If they are distressed, it can help if you hold them and breathe slowly and deeply.^1,2

With older children it’s important to help them identify who their safe and trusted adults are by talking with them about who they trust and are most comfortable talking to.

Remind children regularly that they do not need to deal with concerns on their own and talk to them about where they can access support. This might include teachers, family members and services such as Childline.

Just knowing there is someone to turn to when they need to can have a positive impact on a child’s mental health.

Help children find the tools they need to express themselves

It’s important to encourage children to explore their feelings in a way which works for them. For example, this could be verbally, through sign language or through play to represent their world.

Children of different ages, with different developmental levels, or with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND), may not be able to express themselves or communicate clearly or easily. Make sure you always give children the time, tools and support they need.

Consider providing a range of ways for children to express themselves. This could be through drawing, listening to or creating music or writing their thoughts and feelings down in a journal. They may want to share these with you or keep them private.

Childline’s Toolbox provides online activities for children to express themselves, including:

• an art box where children can put their feelings into words or drawings
• a calm zone where children can relax, de-stress and take their mind off how they’re feeling
• a mood journal to help children record what they’re feeling and why
• a buddy zone aimed at under 12s which includes activities and games.

Behaviour is one way children might express how they are feeling. Respond to children’s behaviour in a calm and understanding way. You might want to wonder out loud about why a child is feeling or behaving in a certain way. Helping children learn words to name their feelings and letting them know you are interested in what they are experiencing can support them to understand and accept different emotions.³ 

When talking to children about their mental health and wellbeing, avoid using technical or diagnostic language which they might find unfamiliar, confusing and distant from their experiences. Instead try to adopt the language they use themselves. By paying attention to and reflecting the language children use, you can help them feel listened to. 

Make sure you understand what they mean by certain terms, and ask questions if you need clarification. For example, a child may use the word “anxiety” to describe a feeling of general nervousness or as a way to describe severe anxiety attacks.

> Find out more about tools you can use to gain an understanding of children’s mental health and wellbeing

Some children may feel uncomfortable about talking to an adult. They might prefer to turn to other young people for help and support.⁴

You might want to consider introducing a peer mentoring scheme, or children can talk with other young people on Childline’s moderated message boards.

Conversation starters

The Childline website provides age-appropriate information and advice about a range of topics that can help you to start a discussion. You can also signpost children to Childline if they need additional support before or after a conversation.

Topics covered include:

• feelings, including support on managing anxiety
• bullying and cyberbullying, including tips on taking care of your mental health
• friends, relationships and sex
• family relationships.

Childline Kids provides tailored information and advice for under 12s, using age-appropriate language.

We’ve also put together a reading list of books on mental health from our library catalogue. You could share some of these with children and their families to help get the conversation going.

Helpful strategies

If a child is struggling with their mental health, they need support. Try to discuss with them what might help and follow your organisation's procedures for sharing your concerns.

> Read more about the support available for children’s mental health

It’s also important to help children identify ways they can look after their mental health and wellbeing. Encourage children to think of their mental health and wellbeing as something that is continually changing, like physical health. Some days we might feel better or worse than others but there are things we can do to improve our overall mental and emotional wellbeing. Talk to them about strategies they can use to take care of themselves.

Watch our experts discuss how we can support children with their mental health.

Exercise

Staying physically active can have positive effects on mental health. It can reduce stress, anxiety and other mental health issues, and increase self-esteem.^1,2

Encourage children to build physical activity into their daily routines, from talking a daily walk to participating in extracurricular sports activities.

The amount and type of exercise available or appropriate will differ from child to child. Young children can be encouraged to release their energy through activities such as wiggling, clapping or stamping. Children who have disabilities or children with injuries or health conditions may be limited in the exercise they can do. There are other ways they can stay active, for example by helping with housework, playing interactive video games or gardening.

Explain that it’s important for your body to have time to rest as well as being physically active. Too much physical exertion may have a negative impact on a child’s physical health, which can affect children’s wellbeing.

Online wellbeing

The internet and social media are integral to many children’s lives. They can have a positive impact on children’s wellbeing by helping them connect with family and friends and express themselves in new ways.

But the online world also carries risks that may affect children’s safety and mental health.

> Get more information on protecting children from online abuse

Encourage children to talk about how being online makes them feel. What do they like and dislike about it? What can you do to help children feel happy and safe when they are online?

Make sure children know who to talk to if they have concerns or questions.

> Take our online safety training to make sure you have the skills you need to keep children safe online

> See all our resources and information about online safety

> Look at our information for parents about online safety on the NSPCC website

> View Childline’s child-friendly information about online and mobile safety

Healthy relationships

Relationships play a key part in every baby's, child's or young person’s wellbeing, from friends and teachers to parents, carers and siblings.

Being able to form healthy relationships can help children feel secure and supported. But experiencing unhealthy or abusive relationships can have a long-lasting negative impact.

> Find out more about our Building Connections service helping young people tackle loneliness head-on

> Find out more about promoting healthy relationships

> Access our Look, Say, Sing, Play resources to support interaction between parents and their babies

> Read our information on protecting children from bullying and cyberbullying

Tools from Childline

Childline provides many online tools that children and young people may find helpful if they are feeling anxious or stressed:

• calm zone - activities to let go of stress
• games to take your mind off things
• information and advice on topics from feelings, relationships, family and schools
• guidance on how to build a mental health first aid kit
• peer support message boards
• Childline Kids, a section of the Childline website tailored for under 12s.

Sharing tips with parents and carers

It’s important that all the adults in a child’s life are able to promote that child’s mental health and wellbeing. If you work closely with parents and carers, you can share tips and resources to help them do this.

Interacting with younger children

The early years of a child’s life can help lay the foundations of wellbeing for their future.¹ Positive interactions with adults during this time can help improve child’s mental wellbeing throughout their lives.

If you work with parents and carers who have young children, encourage them to:

• have individual face-to-face activity with their child, such as talking, singing and playing
• follow the child’s lead: focus on what they choose, and support and encourage their curiosity
• maintain eye contact, as this helps build a strong relationship.

Our Look, Say, Sing, Play resources introduce parents to techniques designed to help them improve interaction with their baby, and be more sensitive to their baby’s cues.

If parents are experiencing their own mental health issues, it can make it harder for them to establish a secure bond with their child. Our Pregnancy in Mind service supports parents-to-be who are at risk of, or currently experiencing, mild to moderate anxiety and depression during their pregnancy. It aims to build parents’ capacity to provide sensitive, responsive care to their babies.

> Find out more about how interacting with young children can help their brain development

Maintaining a routine

A steady routine can help provide stability in a child’s life, which can give children a sense of security and help reduce stress. Here are some tips you can suggest to parents and carers you work with:

• plan regular weekly activities, such as seeing friends and relatives or taking part in a club or hobby
• have regular mealtimes
• set and stick to bed times, particularly for younger children, as sleep is important for children’s mental and physical wellbeing²
• establish a night time routine for younger children, such as reading a story before bed 
• work with older children to create a routine that works for them – including homework, seeing friends, extra-curricular activities and time offline.

Advice for parents on the NSPCC website

The NSPCC website has a range of information to help parents and carers support their child's mental health.

Some parents and carers may feel unsure about how to talk to their child about feelings and emotions. Share the following pointers to help them start a conversation with their child:

• choose an appropriate time when others aren’t around or where you won’t be interrupted
• actively listen to how your child feels
• be patient and let your child talk in their own time
• make it clear that you support their child.

> Share our advice for parents and carers on supporting their child’s mental health

> Provide parents and carers with information on how they can talk to children about sex and relationships

> Send parents and carers information on what to do if their child is experiencing bullying or cyberbullying